As of now I'm
watching him from afar. I am sitting still here. He's practicing with the
Praise and Worship Team for tomorrow's Sunday Service. And even though I keep
my eyes on the computer screen, I still hear his serene voice as he sings. I
just can't help noticing his tender voice :) And when I look again I can't help
thanking God that my boyfriend is now already a pastor :)
I first met him almost in the same situation (almost,
hehe). I was leading the worship then. He, together with his mom, dad and a
family friend entered the church sanctuary and sat on the back. Being in the
stage, I can see almost everybody in the congregation. I had a thought at that
moment, "They look familiar? hmmm".. But actually I notice them
because they are unfamiliar faces. Haha anggulo lang. But I can sense that
there's something with these people. I knew already that they are christians
because of the way they behave during the service. I notice "him",
"hmmm... nakagreen sya, chubby, may salamin, at parang may something
sakanya na di ko madistinguish.." Haha.. in a short glance I had several
conclusions already. So that is how I first met "him".
How does it
feel to be "his" girlfriend?
Before that
let's define who "he" is.
He is a busy
person ever since I met him. He is an engineer by profession and working in a
reputable company. Despite his busy corporate functions, he take his ministry
in the church seriously. After he moved from another church to our local
church, his promotions took place shortly. He became one of our worship
leaders. He is also the head of the Singles' Ministry. He became one of the
church's leaders. Aside from that, he has several extra curricular activities.
And oh! He is a loving son to his family and an upright kuya/brother to his
siblings. And I forgot to tell you, he is few years older than me. He used to
be one of the kuyas to me. Kaya naman, bachelor na bachelor na sya, neneng nene
parin ako that time.
Now let's
define "me" before we became lovers.
I was a
college student. Inexperienced about everything related to the corporate world.
Busy though as one of the youth leaders in the church. Totally youthful and
playful. Who would ever thought we'll be together?
So back to
the question: How does it feel to be "his" girlfriend?
To be his
girlfriend, one must understand that he is "really" busy :) He
always do something. He always have a meeting. He always speak with and greet
almost everyone he met along the way (although an exaggeration). So to be his
girlfriend, one should also be accommodating to people
who interrupts our time together. To be his girlfriend you must
adjust to his level of thinking (kahit halfway lang). Most especially in the
kind of relationship we have (what they call "May-December Love
Affair"). To be his girlfriend you must wait until he finishes his tasks,
or you should help him. And to be his girlfriend you must be ready to receive
advices even in a small aspect of daily living (e.g. how to drink a
coffee, haha! peace!) If you're he's girlfriend, you must know that he is
easily sick because of exhaustion :( And when he has spare time he keep
on fidgeting on his ipod's "soccer game app".
But despite
his busy schedule he always make time. He always remind me how well I am loved.
When I am down he always do his best to take may frown away. He always do his
best to see that curve in my face. In times of hardships and trials, he stand
still like a strong soldier. Yet in times of weakness he always cling to the
Lord for strength. In times of confusion he never fail to be submissive to our
leaders. He always remind me to focus on Jesus. He is truly a Christ-centered
servant of God :) I just want to share one specific season of our lives when I
had anxiety caused by hypothyroidism. I was really misunderstood that time.
Even I myself had a hard time understanding my own emotions. I'm always
paranoid, scared, I feel like going crazy. But he stood by my side. He never
left even in my weakest point. He never left even if I felt like I'm really
messed up. And I know, together with my family and friends, God used him to
strengthen and uplift me. I learned that love is not just about the
"kilig" factor or the happy times together. It's about selflessness,
compassion, and love itself.
But does that
mean we have a perfect relationship?
Definitely
not. We started "not well". (And that's another story) Sometimes we
commit mistakes. Yes, we had fights. Sadly, there are times we hurt other. But
it is the Lord who corrects us. And we are totally dependent to the Lord
on how we will run our relationship. It is the Lord who planted the
"seed" of love in our hearts and it is He who nurtures and grows it.
Ultimately we desire to glorify Him through our relationship. We believe that
the Holy Spirit will guide us along the way. Also we are grateful to our
parents and leaders for their support and guidance. And also to our friends who
shares the joy with us :)
"He"
is now facing another chapter of "his" life..
Last November
20, 2012, he took the Exhorter's Exam of our denomination together with two of my
friends. And Praise God! They passed. We can say that they are now licensed
preachers/pastors already. I can say that now, "My Boyfriend is a
Pastor". Of course, there are added responsibilities to "his"
busy schedule. I should expect more meetings and more people will come into
"his" life. But I am so happy for "him". I know God will
use "him" even more. And I would be very glad to join him in
"his" ministry. I would gladly support "him". I would be
glad to be accountable to him. I would be glad to support and pray for
"him". I would be very honored to be by "his" side serving
the Lord...
